LOL

Okay, I've been browsing through my quote book again this morning. Today, I'd like to share some from one of my favorite authors, the late Erma Bombeck. I first read one of her books when I was only about 14 or 15 years old, but I was hooked by her honesty and wit. Now, as a mother, I truly identify with her and am glad to see someone so honest about the unglamorous, yet wonderful, life of a housewife. Enjoy!

"Seize the moment. Think of all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart."

"My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first one being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint."

"I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage."

"I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars."

"In two decades I've lost 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet."

"I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes."

"Mothers have to remember what food each child likes or dislikes, which one is allergic to penicillin and hamster fur, who gets carsick and who isn't kidding when he stands outside the bathroom door and tells you what's going to happen if he doesn't get in right away. It's tough. If they all have the same hair color they tend to run together."

"My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car."

"Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen? Three. It takes one to say, "What light?" and two more to say, "I didn't turn it on."

"No one loves a Christmas tree on Jan. 1..... Next to the presidency, detrimming a tree has to be the loneliest job in the world. It has fallen to women for centuries and is considered a skill only they can do, like replacing the roll on the toilet tissue spindle, painting baseboards, holding a wet washcloth for a child who is throwing up or taking out a splinter with a needle."

"Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other."

When you have time, clink on this link for a moving tribute to Mrs. Bombeck centered around her thoughts on "If I had my life to live over". Every mother should read this, and often.